Author: Risë Birnbaum

TRUMP AND CROCKETT — KINGS OF THE WILD FRONTIER

WHO COULD GUESS WILD CARD DONALD TRUMP WOULD WIND UP THE REPUBLICAN NOMINEE FOR PREZ? NOT ME. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS. TALK ABOUT WILD.

DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT EVERY TIME I SEE TRUMP AT A PODIUM WITH HIS FRESHLY-DYED, GOLDEN-TOPPED HAIR (OR HAIR SUBSTITUTE) I THINK OF DAVY CROCKETT. DAVY PROUDLY WORE THAT COONSKIN CAP, SO REMINISCENT OF TRUMP’S FAVORED HEADPIECE.

SO, I DID SOME DIGGING AND HERE ARE THE TOP WAYS TRUMP AND DAVY ARE ALIKE:

• THE HAIR APPARENT – BOTH HAD A THING ABOUT THAT THING ON THEIR HEAD

• TV SHOWS – TRUMP HAD THE APPRENTICE AND DAVY CROCKETT HAD A SHOW

    (AND A SONG) IN THE 50s

• MULTIPLE WIVES – TRUMP 3, CROCKETT 2

• POLITICS – BOTH TRUMP AND CROCKETT HAD DIFFERENT CAREERS BEFORE TOSSING

    THEIR “HAT” IN THE RING FOR POLITICAL CAREERS

• KNIVES & GUNS – BOTH TRUMP AND CROCKETT ARE PRO-WEAPONS

    (TRUMP EVEN PRO-NUKE)

• ANTI-MEXICAN – TRUMP WANTS TO BUILD A WALL AND CROCKETT WAS AT THE

    ALAMO AND WAS KILLED BY MEXICAN SOLDIERS

SO, THERE YOU HAVE IT. A FAST LOOK AT HOW TRUMP AND CROCKETT ARE TWINSIES.

JUDGING SARAH

palinI just read that someone is actually giving Sarah Palin a gavel and her own “Judge Judy-like” syndicated TV show.  Has everyone lost their mind?  What… was Judge Ito not available?

Remember, this is the same woman who can see Russia from her front porch and couldn’t name one newspaper or magazine that she reads when Katie Couric asked her. Trust me, it’s not the New Yorker.

Yes, I know you don’t actually need to be a judge or even a lawyer to “mediate” cases, and the defendant and the plaintiff get paid for showing up on these reality court shows.  But, Sarah Palin???  Really?

Oh, wait.  Sarah is not a TV virgin.  She hosted “Sarah Palin’s Alaska” on TLC and what a big hit that was.  I actually tuned in once to see Sarah shoot an elk…several times.  Nice job, Sarah.

This show has been in the works since 2015 when Sarah was approached by the same TV exec who found Judge Judy and Judge Brown.  Just one difference.  Those guys are actual judges.  Sarah Palin is an actual airhead.

Do airheads generate TV ratings?  Yes, they do.  Just look at the Bravo reality “Housewives” franchise.  Now, some of those women are smart cookies, like Lisa Vanderpump.  But, others must have an IQ about 90 on a good day and Sarah Palin is in that camp.  I’m amazed this TV exec had the cojones to pick Palin.  What chutzpah!  Have our brains turned to absolute mush that we need to be spoon fed pure pablum?  The TV exec who came up with this courtroom disaster should consider giving up his license.

I was a network correspondent so I understand TV and the need for ratings.  But, shame on any station that picks up this show.  Can you even imagine Sarah deciding who owes money to whom for back rent, or the fate of a husband who insists his wife was stealing from him?  Sarah’s out of her depth on these kinds of tough issues.  If anything, I think she should completely steer clear of TV from now on.  Instead she should stick to snowmobiling down a hill or maybe gutting a fish or two and then going to check on her misguided family.

When her husband just got hurt in a snowmobile accident, I figured the guy was driving at 90 mph without a helmet.  Whenever I hear Sarah speak, I feel she’s also had one bad bounce too many without a helmet.

I say we boycott this show.   Not judging or anything. ; )  Who’s with me?